:-( August 13, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Gloomy Mood, Low Tides.Tags: Feeling Low
2 comments
Nothing can be worst than this. When someone insignificant makes you sulk and feel down !!
That moment you promote them from insignificant to significant.
The Law of Garbage Truck is tough to implement ….
Take my word ..very very tough !! 
Seriously July 31, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Low Tides, Thoughts.Tags: Love, Sad
5 comments
When I wrote this; I did not mean to ridicule “love” as such. No words can justify how blissful it is to be in love ; having that someone who loves you equally or more !!
Someone whom you allow into your dreams; just to make them complete. A state where you realize how much life was incomplete before. A feeling of trance where someone else becomes high priority than self.
Once reached there; it is very difficult to suddenly shut down and throw everything out of life and mind and act as if everything is alright. The absence of love also can not be justified by words. Everything feels weak in front of that hurt.
Why people don’t think 100 times before commitment ? Why commitment is so easy to roll back for some people ?
What is worst among all this is seeing someone near one to go through all this. You can feel the pain ; pinch and unpractical behavior but all you can do is give some hope. It is even more difficult to give hope when both of you realize there is no hope. The every moment that breaks a strong person like a fragile glass is painful, fearful and sad.
All I can do is ask Dear GOD to give some of my blessing to that near one. Part of my smile , part of my hopes and strength to dream again. Let the time run faster and faster. If you can give him theose feeling-lost-dreams nothing else can be the best than that !! God please shower your choicest blessings in that part of world; you are needed more there.
Down July 18, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Gloomy Mood, Low Tides.Tags: Down, Feeling Low
3 comments
That’s how I have got to describe my current state which remains same from past one week.
I was down with fever. Meds are on , body is recovering but mind is still down.
I have got food sickness. The desire to eat anything dies as soon as I see the food.
Nothing is pepping me up. I kept myself away from internet for a whole week.
Just nothing seem to be working. Music, Books,TV,Movies,Walks, Work-outs , Food I am so sick of everything.
I don’t know what is killing everything. I hate such states of life.
On Some Days June 20, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Low Tides.Tags: Feeling Low
3 comments
I don’t know what’s wrong with somedays. They are just plain grey making everything sound wierd and waste. I get lost on such days. All I can feel is everything is going wrong way and I keep thinking what I actually want.
There is no prize to guess that I don’t get the answer for the same. It spoils the whole day and I keep trying out options that could make me feel better.
I don’t feel like reading a single blog that has been there in my reader. I don’t like the template I had been using for past many days and liked it. Like a obsession I keep trying out all the templates ; just to realize that the one which was there ( i.e. old one) was the best.
It is so stupid to be like this and I hate the feeling you carry on the whole day.
What worst is you fail to analyse what is wrong with you and sometimes you just go more nuts in the process of analysis.
I hate myself and the whole world on such days …I really do !!
Lesson Learnt In the Capital City June 3, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Low Tides, Rantings.3 comments
When I landed in Delhi for transit; I did not have much plans. Rather I choose the safe bait. I was suppose to board another train at 5p.m. and I almost had 5-6 hours to kill. My plan was straight forward and I actually did not have plan B.
But when I entered in the waiting room then was no room to accomodate another person;it was that crowded. In the scorching heat outside everybody preferred to be in the AC waiting room. I decided to find about the retiring room just to know that none of them are available.
I did not have a option and I called my BIL to help me out with some hotel address. Now I headed the auto stand and when this guy approached me for the rick. I told him I need to go to this XYZ hotel and he said he would charge 20 bucks which I felt was okay. The porter settled the luggage in the rick and he went off.
The Auto Guy : “madam I will take you to another hotel. That hotel is better than your XYZ one. “
Me : “I would like to go to XYZ only. “
Guy 1 : “Then it would be 80 rupees. “
The place was about to be 2 km from station for which this guy1 was asking 80 bucks.
Me : ” You agreed for 20 bucks before. Why 80 bucks now? “
Guy1 : “20 bucks if you come to the hotel I am suggesting. The hotel guy will give me my commission”
Me : ” You should tell all this before in hand. Now with so much luggage how can I walk down to the auto stand ? “
I get down and start walking towards the auto stand. The guy1 calls me again and finally we settle for 50 bucks. Now he calls guy2 to take me to the XYZ place. Guy2 looks like a rowdy,indecent type. But I dont pay much attention thinking it is none of my business and it was just matter of five minutes.
Now thus guy2 takes me to XYZ hotel. When I walk in the hotel ; he follows me which I fail to notice. The hotel does not seem crowded but then the hotel guy says there is no vacancy.
I go to another hotel and same scene every where. This guy2 keeps me telling that “Madam you will not get room in these hotels. Let me take you to the another one. I too will get my commission. “
I blast him ; saying ” just stay out of it. I can manage the things”
Now i enter this fourth hotel and just when this guy is about to follow me he gets a call on his cell and that keeps him busy. The guy on the counter gives me wierd looks.
The hotel guy : ” Is he with you ? “
Me (shocked) : ” He ? No. he is just the auto driver !! “
The hotel guy : “Nobody will give you a room if they spot you with him. He is following you for his commission !! “
Me ( actually scared but acting brave) : ” I see. I have no clue who he is. I need a room for 4-5 hours and I am alone. “
The hotel guy : ” I can give you the room but I would need the ID proof. Also tell the manager that you have been to this hotel last month. “
The manager walks in towards me.
“We can not give her the room” He says.
” I have a prior reservation. Besides I stayed over here last month ” I tell him the lie bluntly.
” Oh I see. Then it should be okay” He says.
All this while the security guy throws out the auto fellow. I hear him informing his boss; the guy1 about how I got myself into a different hotel; not into the one he was suggesting.
Finally I got the room. My heart was beating aloud and I was sweating like hell in the AC room. I have no words to say as I myself was shocked by what happened there for last one hour.
Will be Back April 24, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Low Tides.Tags: Gloomy Moods, Sadness, Unhappy
3 comments
….Soon….yes Hopefully Soon !!
Right now Life is roller coaster ride ….with lot of surpises and testing times….trying to keep the head cool and being composed ..even if you feel like “shoot at sight” to the world of selfish people.
Ne ways thats life ; that makes you to realise the importance of good people in your life and how much we need to cherish them and nurture those relationships !!
Old age is a curse ; specially when your own kids refuse to look after you and you are dependent on them !! more on that later….
Right now ..there is a lot of steam in the system but refusing to vent out…until then….wish good luck to me …..
………I need it most Right now …..
One more thing I need now is a warm hug ….without asking why there are tears in my eyes….
….Shit …I hate the material I am made up of …..totally …. 
Mood of the Moment March 27, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Feeling Low, Low Tides.Tags: Mood, Sad, Upset
4 comments
Mood of the moment :
Depressed, gloomy , feeling horrid, Upset by things happening around , something is bothering which is unknown.
and I am hating all this. Truely.
Need something perky ! Any suggestions ?
P.S : What can be more frustating than writing such a post after a jumpy,happy post
Out of the List… March 6, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Low Tides, Perceptions of Life, World of Cubes.Tags: Work, Cubes
1 comment so far
Today I had to knock out another person’s name from my communicator contacts list. It hurts …
It has been the trend from past few months. Some resigned; some got the pink slip. No matter what ever been the reason the names are going down and down. It hurts more when people go for a wrong reason.
Wondering how much it would have been painful for them who actually went through it. I can never understand what it takes to ask people leave; then and there without even glancing back at your cube/desk.
Does it hurt ? or it is mere part of your job? or the more you take it part of your job; it hurts less. Don’t know how it is and what is the logic behind.
Any ways having said one needs to move on. End of one job is not the end of life right ? Need to keep that brave face up and look for more open doors. I am sure sooner or later they would have got / they will get it ; may be better than the current one. Who knows?
P.S. Communicator is the kind of chatting software which is used in local area network ; within the intranet.
Just a little too much March 5, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Low Tides, Random Scribbles, Rantings.Tags: Feeling Low, Life, Rants
5 comments
Alright , right now I have too many things going in my head,happening around and making my head go dizzy
There is this huge change knocking me out and making me more n more restless and nervous to consume every bit of it like a tequila shot.
This post is was very much required to get the steam out of the system and it may not make sense at all.
It makes me feel weird how much time people have at their disposal to know what is happening in your life and why it is happening and how are you feeling about it.
I wonder if such people will have constipation if they don’t peep into others life. 
I am actually getting bugged with every small thing which is not really required.
Thanks people for tagging me. Will complete them once I get back to myself. Don’t want to screw up things more.
Just wondering what will give solace to my soul. At least I am not able find one.
I want to get rid of these too many things bothering me. The worst part is there is so much dependency on others that I can not manage them alone.
I am proud of Indian Teams victory over Aussie. Happy !! But at the same time I am upset that this cricket match screwed up my Sunday.
TBH was glued to the TV on Sunday forgetting there exists Life beyond cricket. How irritating is that whole Sunday is occupied by Cricket and only Cricket.
The terms like “Spending quality time together”seem like never existed.
I fail to understand this. Full day you want the match ball by ball; night you watch the highlights of the same match; next day morning again you again spend whole one hour reading about the match in the news paper. Ten years down the line if they telecast the match, you will be again hooked to the idiot box to watch the same again !! GOD Give me break. Isn’t this unfair ??
To add to this TBH gets off from office for some festival thingy and he is actually more than happy to send me to office and enjoying the break on his own !! and I am slogging ; actually writing this post sitting right here. 
One of the good things among the mess was the PG is thing is sorted. Got a really decent PG with good facilities.
Some people are so cool and composed. I mean they hardly lose the control over the situation. I am amazed to see such people around.
Again I am still more amazed to see their exist few soul who make such composed people to lose the control.
Too many vague things; too many thoughts; too many things to get worked up; too many things getting screwed up !!
A little too much of everything like a hot and spicy Bhel; too tempting to eat but burning the tongue with spice !! Life is just like that right now !! 
A day-full of You March 3, 2008
Posted by BlueMist in Low Tides, Memories, You and Me.Tags: Memories, You & Me
6 comments
The other side of “A day-full of You” by GreekAlphabets
One day full of you;
I don’t want it !!
even a moment full of you …
cos it will make me wanting more
more and more of you !!
If I can not have you
it will make me sulk
it will make me hate
the life I have without you !!
let me get over it now
if I can not have you later …
